Tonight, i fucked up. In Scene Study class. I was doing a scene from THE MOTHERFUCKER WITH THE HAT, and i am still trying to process the reasons why it happened the way it happened. And I'm not trying to linger in it, I'm just trying to figure out why so I don't ever do it again. Process. So the scene is about two lovers. The guy comes home with a job, the girlfriend gets excited, they were gonna get busy, but she wants to shower first. He discovers a hat and questions her why is there a hat that doesn't belong to him, she denies the fact the hat has anything to do with her. He confronts her and ask why the bed smells like someone just had sex, she says he's crazy and making up things in his mind, he says maybe I am crazy but who is the guy with the hat/slept on this bed? She tries to get him to go to the pie place to talk it out, he agrees.
That's the story. For some reason, after we built the set and the scene started, there was a moment of oh-shit. When we met up to run lines, we did it in a specific way--we made a lot choices with accents, how the character is acting at this point. After we split, I gave myself things to do in the room during certain lines. The way I read or imagine the character stays with me though, and when I performed in class today, and everything I/we prepared pretty much went sour. We didn't say it like the way we rehearsed it, and we were lost.
As i'm writing this, i realize one of the biggest problem i made. I went ahead of myself.. or i had an idea how the scene was supposed to go--how to act it, how it should sound. l almost forgot the thing i told myself to do.. which is.. to let it all go. Get down to the story, and never get to your head about what should/should not happen. Just go with the flow and let the story take you to that landing point.
As I'm realizing this, I know what to do for next week. Still processing what happened this week, but I should just let that go too. Just gotta keep working on it.